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30 June WooHoo TGIFGood Morning to all, Hugss I hope everyone is doing good today . I know most has a long weekend because of the holiday so besafe and have a great time ,and I want to wish you a Happy 4th of July !! Well I best get here and I hope you have a great weekend so take care and hugss , Thank-You for coming by !
This is too funny! It is long, but will give you a good laugh. > > > > WAX is Not your Friend > > CAUTION: Be prepared to laugh out loud...I laughed till I almost cried >as > I could just see this happening! ( And feel it too! ) > > All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, > painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the >wax. > > My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, >play > with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my >mind > > for the next few hours: "Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the > medicine cabinet." So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. > > It was one of those "cold wax" kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, > > you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you >peel them apart > and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair >right off. > > No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but > > I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. > > (YA THINK!?!) > > So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other > stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so >I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. ("Cold wax," >yeah...right!) > > I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. > > It works! > > OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. > > I can do this! > > Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-rah, fighter of all > wayward > body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire. > > With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids, I sneak >back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. > > I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same >procedure, > > I apply the one strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering >the > right half of my *hoo-hoo* and stretching down to the inside of my butt > cheek > > (Yes, it was a long strip) > > I inhale deeply and brace myself....RRRRIIIPPP!!!! > > I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!....OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! > > Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the >strip. CRAP!!! > > Another deep breath and RRIIPP!! > > Everything is swirly and spotted. > > I think may pass out...must stay conscious.. > > Do I hear crashing drums??? > > Breathe, breathe... > > OK, back to normal. > > I want to see my trophy - a wax covered strip, the one that has caused >me so > much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. > > I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold >up the strip! There's no hair on it. > > Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX??? > > Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. > > I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip. > > I touch. I am touching wax. > > CRAP! > > I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now >covered in cold wax and matted hair. > > Then I make the next BIG mistake...remember my foot is still propped up >on the toilet? > > I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down. DANG!!!!!!!! > > I hear the slamming of a cell door. > > "hoo-hoo*? Sealed shut! > > Butt?? Sealed shut! > > I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure > out what to do and think to myself > > "Please don't let me get the urge to poop. > My head may pop off!" > > What can I do to melt the wax? Hot water!! Hot water > melts wax!!! > > I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse >the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, > right??? > > WRONG!!!!!!! > > I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to >torture > prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit. > > Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together > is > having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub...in > scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax. > > So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had >cement-epoxied > myself to the porcelain!! > > God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone > put > in the bathroom!!!!! > > I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some >secret > > of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter - > > "So, my butt and who-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!" > > There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal > but > she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know exactly >where > > the wax is located, "Are we talking cheeks or who-ha?" > > She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown > and > she suggests I call the number on the side of the box. YEAH!!!!! Right!! > I should be the joke of someone else's night. > > While we go through various solutions. I resort to scraping the wax off > with > a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies covered >in > hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then > dry-shaving the sticky wax off!! > > By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm > pretty sure I'm going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this > event. > > My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving > grace....the > lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really have to > lose > at this point? > > I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!! > > The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my >friend. > > It's sooo painful, but I really don't care. > > "IT WORKS!! It works!!" > > I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. > > I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my >grief > and > despair....THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!! > > So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. > > I could have amputated my own leg at this point. > > Next week I'm going to try hair color...... Now thats funny ........ > Notttttttttt > > Send this on to other ladies who need a good laugh A Cool DayGood Morning to all , hugss I hope everyone is having a good day so far but it is still earlie tho lol. Today is going to be a cool day and sunny its was nice yesterday it was hot during the day but cooled down at night it was chilly so it was great sleeping last night with the windows open . Well I best go so I can get dress here so hugs , take care, and see you , Thank-You for coming by .
THIS MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO THOSE OF YOU NOT LIVING IN LAS VEGAS, BUT THERE ARE MORE CATHOLIC CHURCHES IN LAS VEGAS THAN CASINOS. NOT SURPRISINGLY, SOME WORSHIPPERS AT SUNDAY SERVICES WILL GIVE CASINO CHIPS RATHER THAN CASH WHEN THE BASKET IS PASSED. SINCE THEY GET CHIPS FROM MANY DIFFERENT CASINOS, THE CHURCHES HAVE DEVISED A METHOD TO COLLECT THE OFFERINGS. THE CHURCHES SEND ALL THEIR COLLECTED CHIPS TO A NEARBY FRANCISCAN MONASTERY FOR SORTING AND THEN THE CHIPS ARE TAKEN TO THE CASINOS OF ORIGIN AND CASHED IN. THIS IS DONE BY THE CHIP MONKS. 28 June Hump DayGood Morning To All , I hope Everyone is good today , Its Hump day woohoo means the weekend is almost here again that just mean this weekend I have to buckle down and study so I can go take my test next week hopefully if they're still testing . ok all best get up and get dress for school hugss to all and take care , and Thank-You for coming by and have a great day !!
Subject: Looking for their wives
Two guys, one old and one young, are pushing their carts around Home Depot when they collide. The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." The young guy says, "That's OK. It's a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting desperate." The old guy says, "Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?" The young guys says, "Well, she is 27 yrs. old, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs, big boobs, and she's wearing tight white shorts. What does your wife look like?" The old guy says, "Doesn't matter.....let's look for yours;" 27 June Hot & MuggyHi all , I hope Everyone is good , I'm good but its still early in the morning lol. Today is going to be along day I think but I could be wrong lol its my monday I play hooky yesterday but for a good reason had to go to the library and had to make moms doctor appointments . Hugss to all and Thank-You for coming by take care .
A dentist noticed that his next patient, an elderly lady, was looking very nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves. "Do you know how they make these gloves?" he asked.
"No, I don't" she replied.
"Well," he spoofed, "there's a building in China with a big tank of latex.
Workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size."
She didn't crack a smile.
"Oh well, I tried," he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the dental procedure, she burst out laughing. "What's so funny?" he asked.
"I was just picturing how condoms are made!" she said. Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always working! What A Great Day At the Ball Park!Good Day All, It was a great day at the ball park Tigers Won Woohoo it was a good game both teams played good the sun was shining a cool breeze went through the park and Tiger fans and the Cardinal fans were just enjoying the game even tho the Tigers Won its was a great day for all .
I hope everyone is having a great day today, I have even tho I got to bed At 3:30 And got up at 7am lol , but today made me feel alive again being around friends and having good talk and good drinks lol god anymore I sound like a lush lol oh well who cares , I dont for the moment but this weekend has made me think what I Really want in Life , But I'm not going to tell you at this time lol He He. I hope everyoneis having a great day hugsss to all and Thank-You for coming by!!
Texas Chili THIS IS SOME KIND OF CHILI CONTEST If you can read this whole story without tears of laughter running down your cheeks then there's no hope for you! *Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better! For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time the Rodeo comes to town. It takes up a major portion of the parking lot at the Astrodome. The notes are from an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast: Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The Judge #3 called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted". Here are the scorecards from the event: Chili # 1 Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick. Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild. Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy. Chili # 2 Arthur's Afterburner Chili Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang. Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously. Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face. Chili # 3 Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans. Judge # 2 -- A bean less chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers. Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the ba! ck, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting shit-faced from all of the beer. Chili # 4 Bubba's Black Magic Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing. Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili. Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb. bitch is starting to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac? Chili # 5 Linda's Legal Lip Remover Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive. Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded bee! f, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement. Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks. Chili # 6 Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers. Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb. Judge #3-- I shit myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone. Chili # 7 Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers. Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably. Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava like shit to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach. Chili # 8 Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence. Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor dude, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili? 24 June RelaxingGood Day All , I hope everyone is having a great day so far, I've had a good day and going to play my new cd's I bought, I cant wait to hear Shakira and then the Pussycat Dolls lol . Tonight is going to be a relaxing night after last night some of the neighbors were just sitting back and watching the kids playing until three of the boys started a water fight with two girls that did'nt have any water to get back so I decited to get my 150 feet of hose out so the girls could fight back well guess who got nail with water hmmm the fight was on so the other neighbors got into the fight it was a great night the kids had a blast and they told me I was the cool neighbor for being and old fart lol ok I'll stop now and I hope everyone will have a great weekend hugss and Thank-You for coming by !!
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with child's whisper.
"Hello."
"Is your daddy home?" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?"
The child whispered, "No."
Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"
"Yes."
"May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "No."
Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?"
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A hello-copper" answered thewhispering voice.
"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now truly alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."
Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "ME." 23 June Its FridayHi all , Ok this is my second entry my first one took off. I hope everyones day is a great one . It is going to be a beautiful weekend sunny and cooler just right for a Baseball game .I'm going to try to put my jokes again hopefully my entry wont runaway again lol so enjoy them . I hope everyone has a great day and your weenkend too !! Thank-You for stopping by hugss.
Gambling Blonde Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the craps table. A man goes to a dentist to have a tooth pulled. The dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give the man. "No way! No Needles! I hate needles!" the patient yelps. The dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and the man again objects. "I can't do the gas thing the thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating to me!" The dentist then asks if the man has any objection to taking a pill. "No objection", the patient says, "I'm fine with pills". The dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet." The patient says, "Wow - I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!" "It doesn't," said the dentist, "but it'll give you something to hold onto when I pull out your tooth." 22 June Sunny DayHi All , Its going be a sunny day but hot lol. I forgot to put what tree I'am from yesterday entry, I'm a WALNUT it was half right but it was interesting tho to do . The week is almost over and I cant wait till Friday and Sunday , Friday I can have a few beers and Sunday my best friend Plan a outing for the Baseball game from where she works plus her brother is coming into town he also has tickets for that game so this should be fun day. Detroit is playing St Louis so it should be a good game . Well I best get so hugss to all and I hope you have a great Day & Night , Thank-You for stopping by !!
: Southern Grandmother
Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if
> >>>they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern
> >>>small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a
> >>>grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and
> >>>asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
> >>> She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've
> >>>known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a
> >>>big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you
> >>>manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think
> >>>you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never
> >>>will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I
> >>>know you."
> >>> The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he
> >>>pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs.
> >>>Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why,
> >>>yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too.
> >>>He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a
> >>>normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the
> >>>worst in the entire state.
> >>> Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.
> >>>One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him." The defense attorney
> >>>almost died. The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench
> >>>and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks her
> >>>if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair 21 June Its A Stormy DayGood Day To All , Its going to be A stormy day, I feel like staying in my jammies and in bed today lol. I hope everyone will have a great day hugss to all and Thank-You for stopping by !!
WHAT TREE DID YOU FALL FROM ? Find your birthday and then find your tree. Then look below for meanings. This is fun and somewhat accurate in line with Celtic astrology. Then send it to all your friends (including the one that sent it to ! you) so they can find out what tree you and they fell from, but don't forget to change the subject line to your tree. Dec 23 to Jan 01 Apple Tree Jan 01 to Jan 11 Fir Tree Jan 12 to Jan 24 Elm Tree Jan 25 to Feb 03 Cypress Tree Feb 04 to Feb 08 Poplar Tree Feb 09 to Feb 18 Cedar Tree Feb 19 to Feb 28 Pine Tree Mar 01 to Mar 10 Weeping Willow Tree Mar 11 to Mar 20 Lime Tree Mar 21 (only) Oak Tree Mar 22 to Mar 31 Hazelnut Tree Apr 01 to Apr 10 Rowan Tree Apr 11 to Apr 20 Maple Tree Apr 21 to Apr 30 Walnut Tree May 01 to May 14 Poplar Tree May 15 to May 24 Chestnut Tree May 25 to June 03 Ash Tree June 04 to June 13 Hornbeam Tree June 14 to June 23 Fig Tree June 24 (only) Birch Tree June 25 to July 04 Apple Tree July 05 to July 14 Fir Tre! e July 15 to July 25 Elm Tree July 26 to Aug 04 Cypress Tree < BR>Aug 05 to Aug 13 Poplar Tree Aug 14 to Aug 23 Cedar Tree Aug 24 to Sep 02 Pine Tree Sep 03 t! o Sep 12 Weeping Willow Tree Sep 13 to Sep 22 Lime Tree Sep 23 (only) Olive Tree Sep 24 to Oct 03 Hazelnut Tree Oct 04 to Oct 13 Rowan Tree Oct 14 to Oct 23 Maple Tree Oct 24 to Nov 11 Walnut Tree Nov 12 to Nov 21 Chestnut Tree Nov 22 to Dec 01 Ash Tree Dec 02 to Dec 11 Hornbeam Tree Dec 12 to Dec 21 Fig Tree Dec 22 (only) Beech Tree YOUR TREE ( listed in alphabetical order) Apple Tree (Love) -- quiet and shy at times; lots of charm, appeal, and attraction; pleasant attitude; flirtatious smile; adventurous; sensitive; loyal in love; wants to love and be loved; faithful and tender partner; very generous; many talents; loves children; needs affectionate partner. Ash Tree (Ambition) -- extremely attractive; vivacious; impulsive; demanding; does not care for criticism; ambitious; intelligent; talented; likes to play with fate; can be very egotistic; reliable; restless lover; sometimes money rules over the heart; demands attention; needs love and much emotional support. Beech Tree (Creative) -- has good taste; concerned about looks; materialistic; good organization of life and career; economical; good leader; takes no unnecessary risks; reasonable; splendid lifetime companion; keen on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc.). Birch Tree (Inspiration) -- vivacious; attractive; elegant; friendly; unpretentious; modest; does not like anything in excess; abhors the vulgar; loves life in nature and in calm; not very passionate; full of imagination; little ambition; creates a calm and content atmosphere. Cedar Tree (Confidence) -- of rare strength; knows how to adapt; likes unexpected presents; of good health; not in the least shy; tends to look down on others; self-confident; a great speaker; determined; often impatient; likes to impress others; has many talents; industrious; healthy optimism; waits for the one true love; able to make quick decisions. Chestnut Tree (Honesty) -- of unusual stature; impressive; well-developed sense of justice; fun to be around; a planner; born diplomat; can be irritated easily; sensitive of others feelings; hard worker; sometimes acts superior; feels not understood at times; fiercely family oriented; very loyal in love; physically fit. Cypress Tree (Faithfulness) -- strong, muscular; adaptable; takes what life has to give but doesn't necessarily like it; strives to be content, optimistic; wants to be financially independent; wants love and affection; hates lone! liness; passionate lover which cannot be satisfied; faithful; quick-te mpered at times; can be unruly and careless; loves to gain knowledge; needs to be needed. Elm Tree (Noble-mindedness) -- pleasant shape; tasteful clothes; modest demands; tends not to forgive mistakes; cheerful; likes to lead but not to obey; honest and faithful partner; likes making decisions for others; noble-minded; generous; good sense of humor; practical. Fig Tree (Sensibility) -- very strong minded; a bit self-willed; honest; loyal; indepe! ndent; hates contradiction or arguments; hard worker when wants to be; loves life and friends; enjoys children and animals; few sexual relationships; great sense of humor; has artistic talent and great intelligence. Fir tree (Mysterious) -- extraordinary taste; handles stress well; loves anything beautiful; stubborn; tends to care for those close to them; hard to trust others, yet a social butterfly; likes idleness and laziness after long demanding hours at work; rather modest; talented; unselfish; many friends; very reliable. Hazelnut Tree (Extraordinary) -- charmi ng; sense of humor; very demanding but can also be very understanding; knows how to make a lasting impression; active fighter for social causes and politics; popular; quite moody; sexually oriented; honest; a perfectionist; has a precise sense of judgment and expects complete fairness. Hornbeam Tree (Good Taste) -- cool beauty; cares for looks and condition; good taste; is not egoistic; makes life as comfortable as possible; leads a reasonable and disciplined life; looks for kindness and acknowledgment in an emotional partner; dreams of unusual lovers; is seldom happy with feelings; mistrusts most people; is never sure of decisions; very conscientious. Lime Tree (Doubt) - intelligent; hard working; accepts what life dishes out, but not before trying to change bad circumstances into good ones; hates fighting and stress; enjoys getaway vacations; may appear tough, but is actually soft and relenting; always willing to make sacrifices for family and friends; has many talents but not always enough time to use them; can become a complainer; great leadership qualities; is jealous at times but extremely loyal. Maple Tree (Independence of Mind) -- no ordinary person; full of imagination and originality; shy and reserved; ambitious; proud! ; self-confident; hungers for new experiences; sometimes nervous; has many complexities; good memory; learns easily; complicated love life; wants to impress. Oak Tree (Brave) -- robust nature; courageous; strong; unrelenting; independent; sensible; does not like change; keeps feet on the ground; person of action. Olive Tree (Wisdom) -- loves sun, warmth and kind feelings; reasonable; balanced; avoids aggression and violence; tolerant; cheerful; calm; well-developed sense of justice; sensitive; empathetic; free of jealousy; loves to read; loves the company of sophisti! cated people. Pine Tree (Peacemaker) -- loves agreeable company; craves peace and harmony; loves to help others; active imagination; likes to write poetry; not fashion conscious; great compassion; friendly to all; falls strongly in love but will leave if betrayed or lied to; emotionally SOFT; low self esteem; needs affection and reassurance. Poplar Tree (Uncertainty) -- looks very decorative; talented; not very self-confident; extremely courageous if necessary; needs goodwill and pleasant surround! ings; very choosy; often lonely; great animosity; great artistic natur e; good organizer; tends to lean toward philosophy; reliable in any situation; takes partnership seriously. Rowan Tree (Sensitivity) -- full of charm; cheerful; gifted without egoism; likes to draw attention; loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications; is both dependent and independent; good taste; artistic; passionate; emotional; good company; does not forgive. Walnut Tree (Passion) -- unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts; often e! gotistic; aggressive; noble; broad horizon; unexpected reactions; spontaneous; unlimited ambition; no flexibility; difficult and uncommon partner; not always liked but often admired; ingenious strategist; very jealous and passionate; no compromise. Weeping Willow (Melancholy) - likes to be stress free; loves family life; full of hopes and dreams; attractive; very empathetic; loves anything beautiful; musically inclined; loves to travel to exotic places; restless; capricious; honest; can be influenced but is not easy to live with when pressured; sometimes demanding; good intuition; suffers in love until they find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to make others laugh Smile...your in the presence of greatness!!! 20 June I Want To Say Thank-You RosemaryHi All , I want to say Thank-You to Rosemary for all her hard work on my Pic in my sandbox and plus all the help she giving me in my site !! Today is going be a nice cool day the sun is shining a cool breeze this morning birds are singing ,I have a pair of Cardinals in my back yard I love to watch them, alot of people dont that the male is the bright red and female is a daul red but, have watch how sweet the male is to the female if she feeding he sit up high to watch over her to make sure she ok, then he'll fly over to her to be close it looks like they kiss becauseget so close to each other their beaks touch its amazing just to watch them ok I'm done going on about my birds lol well hugss to all and Thank-You for coming by !! And theres another joke for ya!! Some Stupid Facts
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
19 June Its MondayHi all, I hope your weekend was great ,I had a good weekend and my Monday is not bad either but the day is not over yet lol but I hope everyone is having a great day anyways but I dont have much to say today so hugss to all and Thank-You coming by and I hope you will enjoy the joke here I laugh my butt off at it so enjoy!!!
A little boy and a little girl, both about eight years old, were playing in the sandbox. Unexpectedly, the little boy farts, causing a little sand between his legs to shift. The little girl notices, and squeals with laughter.
"How'd you do that?" she asks. "Easy," he exclaimed, "I just farted."
"Can I try it," she asks?
"Sure," he says, "anybody can do it."
She concentrates as she strains and grunts. Suddenly, there's a huge explosion, the sides of the sandbox fly off, all the sand flies out, and the little boy is thrown 20 feet, landing up against a tree.
He groggily gets to his feet, runs back to where the little girl is. He finds her laying on the ground, out cold, flat on her back, spread eagle.
Curiously, he lifts up her dress, peeks underneath, and loudly exclaims, "Just what I thought, dual exhaust!" 17 June A lil HumorA U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Basra when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened. The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. "I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein is a miserable, lowlife, scumbag, and he yelled back that Senator Ted Kennedy is a good-for-nothing, fat, left wing liberal drunk. So I said that Osama Bin Laden dresses and acts like a frigid, mean spirited woman!" He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well so does Hillary Clinton!" "And, there we were, standing in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us." Its a hot dayHi All , I hope everyone is doing great today. Well my neighbor and me was up dinking till 4:30 last night good fire , good talk and music and ice cold beers but I do have to say the women hung better than the men did lol I found one of my neighbor asleep at my computer, I had to go get his wife and help him home at 2 lol to funny but all he said he had a great time I told him tell me that tomorrow after he wakes up, so I saw him today he said he was not drinking with the women again lol I guess we will see next week lol ok all I hope you have a great weekend and a great day hugsss Thank-You coming by !!
16 June TGIFHi All, It is Friday Woohoo I'm a Happy Camper now I can have a nice ice cold Beer I'll need it by the end of the day its going to be Hot Hot Hot lol that mean a lighting my fire pit and turning on the music and the neighbors coming over and relaxing . well I'm off here have to get ready for school woohoo lucky me lol but be for I leave going put up a joke for all , so hugss and Thank-You for coming by ...... THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES! 15 June You have to love e-mails that can make you cry and laugh!Hi All , My brother sent me this E-mail and I wanted to share it because I love animals , and think most do But I had a white German shepard like that I love her because she knew when I did'nt feel good or if someone was trying to hurt me she would go after them . If I called her she would stop on a dime and come running she loved to drink my beer she would steal it if I left it where she could get it , then she run around the yard with the can in her mouth chopping on it making this crunch sound . I had her only 2yrs I lost her to someones sick minded way because they were pissed at me they Poision her to get back at me but this e-mail made me think of her and how much she was a Blessing in my life even if it was for a moment . Ok I'm done going on about my baby lol Hope everyone enjoys my story to the one bellow it . Hugs and Thank-You for coming by and have a great day and night !!
  A Great Dog Story ..............Anyone who has pets will really like this. You'll like it even if you > don't >> and you may even decide you need one! >> >> Mary and her husband Jim had a dog named 'Lucky.' Lucky was a real >> character. Whenever Mary and Jim had company come for a weekend visit >> they >> would warn their friends to not leave their luggage open because Lucky > would >> >> help himself to whatever struck his fancy. Inevitably, someone would > forget >> and something would come up missing. >> >> Mary or Jim would go to Lucky's toy box in ( the basement and there the >> treasure would be, amid all of Lucky's other favorite toys. Lucky always >> stashed his finds in his toy box and he was very particular >> that his toys stay in the box. >> >> It happened that Mary found out she had breast cancer. Something told >> her >> she was going to die of this disease....in fact, she was just sure it was >> fatal. She scheduded the double mastectomy, fear riding her shoulders. >> >> The night before she was to go to the hospital she cuddled with Lucky. A >> thought struck her... what would happen to Lucky? Although the >> three-year-old dog liked Jim, he was Mary's dog through and through. If >> I >> die, Lucky will be abandoned, Mary thought. He won't understand >> that I didn't want to leave him. The thought made her sadder than >> thinking >> of her own death. >> >> The double mastectomy was harder on Mary than her doctors had anticipated >> and Mary was hospitalized for over two weeks. Jim took Lucky for his > evening >> >> walk faithfully, but the little dog just drooped, whining and miserable. >> >> Finally the day came for Mary to leave the hospital. When she arrived > home, >> Mary was so exhausted she couldn't even make it up the steps to her > bedroom. >> >> Jim made his wife comfortable on the couch and left her to nap. >> >> Lucky stood watching Mary but he didn't come to her when she called. It >> made Mary sad but sleep soon overcame her and she dozed. >> >> When Mary woke for a second she couldn't understand what was wrong. She >> couldn't move her head and her body felt heavy and hot. But panic soon > gave >> way to laughter when Mary realized the problem. She was covered, >> literally >> blanketed, with every treasure Lucky owned! While she >> had slept, the sorrowing dog had made trip after trip to the basement >> bringing his beloved mistress all his favorite things in life. He had >> covered her with his love. >> >> Mary forgot about dying. Instead she and Lucky began living again, >> walking >> further and further together every day. >> >> It's been 12 years now and Mary is still cancer-free. Lucky? He still > steals >> >> treasures and stashes them in his toy box but Mary remains his greatest >> treasure. >> >> Remember....live every day to the fullest. Each minute is a blessing from >> God. And never forget.... the people who make a difference in our lives > are >> not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most > awards. >> >> They are the ones that care for us. 14 June A Beautiful DayHi all , I Hope everyone is having a great day . The sun is shining and a cool breeze is blowing and the birds are singing and so am'I lol ....Today is a day to reflex and dream about anything you want or to be sitting out side and watch the life around you or be laying in a hammack and watch the clouds go by ...... Well I need to make dinner so I'm hoping your day is beautiful as mine is at this moment so hugsssss to all and have a great day and night !!! Thank-You for coming by
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